 Honor thy mother and father (87 views) Subscribe   
  From:  Peaceful (Peacefull3)   12/15/2002 7:03 am  
To:  ALL   (1 of 8)  
 
  512.1  
 
I have a serious question.  How can I 'honor' a parent who has no respect for anyone but themselves and is a true hypocrite?  Just what does "honor" mean?  In my heart I can forgive her daily, but she constantly rips me in little pieces.  Am I doomed to hell because I can't just overlook her behavior?
 
May peace reign supreme.
http://www.mewarga.net 
 

Life is precious - take care of every minute you have. 
 
  
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  From:  David (DavidABrown)    12/15/2002 8:19 am  
To:  Peaceful (Peacefull3)   (2 of 8)  
 
  512.2 in reply to 512.1  
 
Hi,

Honor thy parents is one of the Ten commandments Exodus 20:12. It goes on to say that we need to honor our parents so "that thy days may be long upon the land."

It is very evident that God does not desire disobedience.

Now what happens when disobedient children become parents and the new children now have a disobedient parent.

It makes for a very difficult relationship.

Especially when the parent is a non-Christian and the child is a Christian there is a whole dynamic involved so it is going to require a dynamic approach so solve this.

First and foremost our first parent is our Father in Heaven and we need to be obedient to Him and to be pleasing and acceptable to Him.

Second our earthly parents are our God given parents. The Bible tells us that God has called forth the generations that He makes it happen so writing off a parent or parents isnt an option either.

This is where all the basic relationship skills are going to need to be practiced, it can be especially difficult when there is a difficult history attached to the relationship.

Try to concentrate on what works, areas where you get along. Like if shopping is a fun thing for you two than go shopping and avoid  distance things that dont work.

Keep prayed up and in prayer for them. Prayer will probably make the biggest difference.

Try to show some grace and mercy for them it will probably have to start with you as they usually have no clue as to what grace and mercy are.

Stay the course, look for small victories and small improvements to build on them. Discard the failures and move on toward the victory of a loving relationship.

Lastly hell is the place for people who desire not to be with God. It is not the place for Gods children no matter how many failures we might have or think we have.

Hope this helps.

God Bless you,

David

 

 



David A. Brown
Basic Christian: Forum
www.BasicChristian.org

 
  
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  From:  inhiskingdom   12/15/2002 11:07 am  
To:  Peaceful (Peacefull3)   (3 of 8)  
 
  512.3 in reply to 512.1  
 
Hi. 
Jesus said a greater commandment I give to you, "To love". When you love your parents, love overrules honor to them, when they are unhonorable. Just be there when they need you and help them when they need help. 

In His Love 
Norb 
 
  
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  From:  Barbara (BARBARA3)    12/17/2002 7:20 pm  
To:  Peaceful (Peacefull3)   (4 of 8)  
 
  512.4 in reply to 512.1  
 
Do you ever listen to Dr. Laura? 
We can honor our parents by being the best person we can be. As believers, we know that strength comes from God, not ourselves. 

Honoring someone doesn't mean you tolerate destructive behavior. Look at Bill Clinton. We honored the office of President, but he is an idiot. 

Forgiving someone doesn't mean you tolerate destructive behavior either! 

Where you spend eternity, BTW, is not dependent on YOUR behavior but dependent on what Jesus did for you. 

Shalom

Barbara 
  
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  From:  Peaceful (Peacefull3)   12/18/2002 7:45 am  
To:  ALL   (5 of 8)  
 
  512.5 in reply to 512.4  
 
I want to thank everyone for their insights.  I do believe that now I will be able to deal with this situation based upon Basic Christian teaching.  Your prayers will be much appreciated.
 
May peace reign supreme.
http://www.mewarga.net 
 

Life is precious - take care of every minute you have. 
 
  
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  From:  David (DavidABrown)    12/18/2002 7:48 pm  
To:  Peaceful (Peacefull3)   (6 of 8)  
 
  512.6 in reply to 512.5  
 
Hi Peaceful,

All the best to you!

You defiantly have my prayers and support in this.

Keep in touch and let us know how it is going.

God Bless you,

Your Brother in Jesus,

David



David A. Brown
Basic Christian: Forum
www.BasicChristian.org

 
  
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  From:  Christ, our Hope (amym38)    12/21/2002 1:10 pm  
To:  Peaceful (Peacefull3)   (7 of 8)  
 
  512.7 in reply to 512.1  
 
Hi Peaceful, 
I hope it's ok to jump in here so late...everyone had great answers for you. :) 

This is something I've had to struggle with, too, and I've had to learn the hard way what it means to 'honor' parents who are dishonorable. 

I've learned that it is DIShonoring to my parents to allow them to treat me badly. I used to just let things be said and behavior take place and 'suck it up' and 'pretend' that I was 'just fine.' But inside, of course, I was hurting so badly. But I THOUGHT that it would be 'dishonorable' to say anything or 'make waves.' [that's what it was called whenever I did say 'ouch.'] 

It is honoring to my parents to speak the truth in love to them...even if it hurts them for a moment. It is what Christ Jesus does for us...we don't sometimes like to know we are being sinful in our behavior, but God wants us to be righteous and holy as HE is holy, and we can't be that if we are left to ourselves in the muck of our sin, so He draws us to Himself and shows us our wicked hearts. And we can do the same to those who continue to hurt us, but we just have to make sure it is out of love and not vengeance or bitterness, etc. 

I read a great book called 'Bold Love' by Dan Allender, which tells HOW to love unlovable or evil people. [and how Christ loves US...even when WE are unlovable and evil.] Maybe you could find it at your library. Anyway, it really helped me to see how Christ loves ALL of us, and how to become LIKE Christ in our love for others...even those who continue to want to harm us. [or who do it unknowingly.] 

May God bless you with strength and His power to overcome the obstacles in your life and as you try to make peace in this area. 

Amy

Speaking the Truth in Love: a forum 
 
  
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   From:  Strings17   1/2/2003 3:20 pm  
To:  Peaceful (Peacefull3)   (8 of 8)  
 
  512.8 in reply to 512.1  
 
I do not know why God requires us to honor certain people no matter what they do.The bible tells us to love one another and treat each other with kindness and yet they seem to get a pass on all of that and can do just about anything they want and its ok,sometimes when i read the bible the rules only seem to apply to me and not anyone else.I wish i had some answers but i dont.When i read things like this i feel almost fortunate to not have known either one of my parents,my mother abandoned me at when i was two weeks old and my father died when i was three years old.There were not many people willing to say very much that was good about either one of them so its probably best that i never knew them.I was raised by a Godly grandmother that i do honor and i am thankful to God that he allowed me to be raised by her and not my biological parents. 
  
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